The End of the Daily O

OMG! OMG! Get your Kleenex ready! We are in a countdown toward Oprah WInfrey’s LAST SHOW EVAH!

Yep. The Talk Queen of All Time will shut her shingle this week with an all-star tingle. My goodness! Tom Cruise. Will Smith. Usher. Madonna. Beyoncé. Tom Hanks. John Travolta. Michael Jordan. Maria Shriver. Even STEADY-Man will grace her stage this week until the breathtaking final SURPRISE GUEST on Wednesday!

The public has been told that Oprah doesn’t know who the “surprise” guest will be. Really? How could that be possible? We know that Oprah knows everything and wouldn’t allow just any ole’ person to close out one of the most successful daytime TV programs in the world! She is also not dense and has to have more than a clue. Of course, the “guest” could be herself. Or another half-sibling?

Would anyone care to guess? President Obama is too obvious to be THE ONE. And he and Michelle have already been there. The Pope has been busy attempting to reach God via speaking directly to the astronauts at the Space Station (closer than anyone to Heaven), so count him out. Queen Elizabeth may be the only person in civilization who hasn’t heard of Oprah, therefore I’ll cross her off the list as well.

A few people have suggested that God might make an appearance. Others with a macabre mindset have suggested the resurrection of Michael Jackson or Elvis. Or bringing Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie and Jennifer Aniston together – just for the horrific fun of it all.

Nope. None of the above will do. (Except Oprah, of course.)

Wait! I have a thought. Has anyone seen Gayle King over the months until recently? What if she shows up bearing a baby she had under the radar as the ultimate gift to her paramour, uh, I meant mentor/BFF? Now that would be quite a surprise guest, wouldn’t it? But then, Oprah would already know what Gayle had been hiding from her over the months unless Gayle is able to play hide-and-seek on the level of several of O’s final guests.

I gather we will have to wait until the ultimate curtain call to know. Expect the Tweetie Universe to go crazy and ruin all the fun for those who watch the show in a later time zone.

But Oprah’s not really leaving TV. She’ll still be around. After all, she’s already gone out on her OWN!

(Correction: John Travolta was not part of the gang.)