A Difficult Appearance

Appearance IS everything despite individual desires to strive for Spiritual Transcendence from such lowly energies. How we present ourselves to The Big World matters much – from how The Whites deem "White Trash" to Whites Who Are Embarrassingly Sloppy-Stupid, to what Blacks call their ill-begotten ones the N-Word, to how we dress, comb or don't comb or shave our heads. Forget behaviour (unless it's outrageously socially unacceptable), the Perception Of Appearance – be it from the colour of one's skin to the clothes we are wearing – makes an impression on others whose minds immediately click to a pre-wired belief, be it pro or con.

Witness the recent Oprah Debacle HERE to gain a larger, funnier view of the the latest developments, Was race an issue? Did Saint O forget to have her stylist make her look World Famous that day? Was Oprah slumming-it in causal clothing with a few specs of Ultra Clean Swiss Dust Bunnies playing on the material? Or, could it have been – gasp – snob language problems? (See link above for details.)

For now, let's join Oprah in shrugging-it-off so that Switzerland can remain neutral as always in any conflict, and move on to a personal story detailing similar prejudice by salespeople to hometown friends who were insanely wealthy yet looked entirely the opposite by choice (although they lived very well). In our town, they lived in a mini-castle. An actual castle with winding stone stairways and more! In Florida they lived on the beach in Miami in their large, comfy beach house.

I had heard through The Family (not THAT kind of "Family") a story about my friends' eccentric father who often dressed like a slightly hip, older, funky hippie. He was partially in fashion for the time, as my experience with him was in the late 60's early 70's. I'd already seen the times when he would be wearing jeans so low everyone could almost see his Little Crack – with an expensive sweater or shirt flapping-about on top and slipping-into his snazzy Lamborghini, zooming-off to some place few of us ever knew where…including his wife.

One day at The Other House in Florida, dressed in his usual clean, but wrinkled Beachy Bum Look, he decided he wanted to buy a Rolls Royce for fun. (!) The moment he entered the showroom, he was immediately patronized by a stuffy salesman regarding whether or not Mr. (I Won't Tell) could afford such a vehicle, and if, sniff-sniff, at the very least, Mr. Blank could kindly produce personal identification and proof of income before stepping closer to the car. Hey, it's not as if Mr. Blank hadn't showered that morning; however, it's obvious he didn't fit the image of anyone who not only drives a Rolls Royce, but someone who could afford to own one. Understandable – to a point. Aren't such cars among The Gems of All Cars and should be protected from the grubby, dirty hands of peasants touching its well-crafted curves?

The patronizing, apparently demeaning way in which Mr. Stuffy treated Mr. Blank as if he should Get The Eff out of there is what prompted The Hippie Millionaire to point at the first car he walked toward and say, "I'll buy it. Right now. In cash." And then promptly pulled an enormous wad of crumpled $100 bills amounting to over $500,000 from his wallet, called his bank to wire the remaining amount, paid in full, signed papers, and drove off in the new beauty with a wry smile on his face. One can only imagine the salesman's expression (beyond the inward glee for a great commission).

That sort of story isn't all that new Right Now in our culture, but Then It Was – and, it still is in so many ways. But, my real story involves witnessing how Mr. Blank's wife was treated at an Appliance Store in another part of Florida where Wealthy Types Live. I was with her and her daughters when she needed to buy a new washer and dryer. As she wandered the aisles of the store in her cloth coat of nothing special, with part of her hair going grey gracefully, she was quasi-blocked from becoming too interested in several High Name Brands by condescending remarks and questions from sales people attempting to lure her over to cheaper models.

As she carefully made her decision, I saw the impatience and lack of respect whatsoever for even a Basic Person cross the faces of the cashier and the Main Salesman aka Mr. Stuffy who, by then, had stepped-aside and must have decided to let the poor lady have her delusions before shuffling out the door without a sale. Surprise! Mrs. Blank bought the Best Quality of everything, and when the cashier checked her credit before she paid for everything in full on a Top Credit Card, the Sun Came Out! Roses Bloomed! Suddenly, they were treating her with Grand Respect!

But she still looked the same as she did when she walked into the store.

Until tomorrow, have a Wonderful Whatever!

Image via: http://www.sparkminute.com