Who Deserves A Flog Today?

Bullies are at the end of the lash today, as well as the practice of "hazing" that has caused the deaths of many children. What is the difference between "hazing" and "bullying"? One is socially acceptable in order to prove one's "right" to belong to a group (inclusive), be it in schools/colleges or other organizations/groups. The other - "bullying" - steps just a few shades away from hazing as it involves hassling someone who is considered to be an "outsider" and to ensure that the victim of the denigrating, hurtful behaviour remains a persona non grata (excluded) for whatever it may be that others feel is not "cool" aka "socially acceptable." Or, for something even less, such as having acne or not wearing the "right" clothing. And, as with the case of a teacher, bullying one of his autistic students. 


Bullying often begets bullying, which is a cycle that almost never ends. I was bullied by classmates as a child and teen, and when I became the target of an Internet bully a few years ago, my response was to become a "Bully" too, albeit in a creative way. Nevertheless, my bullying still caused someone(s) to be hassled and laughed at. How immature was that? But, my anger and pain was so strong from the scars of my own harmful experience as a kid that I fell back into the same emotional state of a 13-year-old and reacted to the bully in question for quite some time. And that is part of why we have so much of it going on with both adults and children today. As written somewhere above, bullying begets bullying - and often by example. Who are the positive role models today in modern culture when half of the TV programs tout women pulling each other's hair out and calling each other names for the sake of ratings? When will organizations finally wake-up and realize that "hazing" is not really fun anymore - if ever  - for the "hazees." Aren't better practices available to create loyalty and bonding in groups rather than making a guy run around in women's clothing for a week on campus, or, on the darker side, making someone drink urine and a full bottle of whiskey so they'll throw-up and everyone will cheer, slap them on the back, and shout  "Welcome to (fill in the group's name)". 


A pitiful example of what hazing can do recently occurred in Florida (WTF is in the water down there?). Click Here. Why are people labeling the death of an innocent band member a "hazing" when it it is perfectly clear he was bullied because he didn't believe in hazing. That "fine line" between the two has now crossed over into what I believe is a growing epidemic in our culture. Parents, pay attention to what you are modeling for your children when you push them or anyone else around - physically or verbally. Pay attention tb your own reactions when you watch TV shows with people being absolutely ruthlessly mean to each other. If you need to see that kind of cheap violence and spitball abuse, why not take your own need for anger/bullying expressions and join a club where you can pound the sheet out of a punching bag or, better still, take up wrestling. And, if you aren't a parent with those issues, take the time to notice how your children are acting when they return from school or other outings. The secrets they could be hiding from you could cause you to lose them - to their bullying behaviour (legal) or as the victim of cyber or real-time, real-life abuse (suicide). 


For further info and a new book on the problem of Bullying, please click here: Bully Solution