The Errant Trap

All right. I give in. I admit I have a heart. I also admit that bashing and flogging Lindsay Lohan has become a lot like kicking a bad little puppy into a ditch. I just can't do it anymore. At least right now.

With the news that LiLo has opened her body parts for the bright lights of Playboy Magazine so that she can pay her bills (it is assumed that is the purpose of her deal), combined with more and more scary pictures of her degeneration into the ghost of tragic icons past (do you think there is a wee bit of a Judy Garland look going on in the above picture or am I still taking too many pain pills?), I feel sad for what is happening to her,

Over the past year I have flogged how she has continually vamped around the court system with barely a repercussion, whereas most people would have been thrown in jail for similar antics of flipping off parole obligations. The entitled attitude Lindsay has exhibited throughout her DUI hearings; the jewelry heist; parole violations, has irked me and many others to the point where once compassionate and empathetic people could no longer provide her with a dismissive "Oh, you little Devil" pass.

Instead, the public consensus has been that she has gotten away with too much and, because of the Kid Glove treatment by the court(s) over the years, she has been able to keep on with her clubbing ways; thus causing her once-young looking self to slide into the scary crack-ho land of deceptive mirrors with a twist of lime added to the vodka to ensure puffiness and often hollow eye sockets. Just in time for Halloween, no less.

But now I wince when I see the latest pictures of her. I don't see someone who is in their 20's. I see someone who has aged by twenty years since 2007. And it's painful to witness. More so to read that she has been (reportedly) accepting special favours from wealthy men in Europe as if she is On Call (wink-wink), following-up with a full spread in Playboy.

Not that modeling for Playboy is always tacky, but still...it's a long way from The Parent Trap. It is a long way from her dalliance with Samantha Ronson, too. At least in those days she may have been way too thin, but one could still recognize her face as that of Lindsay Lohan.

You know, I really haven't followed her career. I wasn't interested. But my interest was piqued when she began crashing into anything that moved near her whenever she was driving, and when she repeatedly went to rehab only to relapse time and again. It became an unfortunate stream of watching the cliche'd trainwreck mingled with disgust at the legal system for allowing her to continually flaunt "bad behaviour."

Now her spiral, at least in mine eyes, has reached a new low. Somehow the idea of LiLo posing nude for a magazine creeps me out. It just feels tawdry. And I'm not being a prude. I look at the sad new pictures and all I see is a sorry mess on the verge of serious disaster.

Lindsay, your mother/manager isn't doing you any favours. Your father was arrested again and he's been a putz for years. You have barely had a chance to pull out of the grip of fame-gone-bad with the enablers around you. All I can say is that I hope someone slips into your life who doesn't need you for a meal ticket and that somewhere in your poor curdled, fried brain you will finally accept that you have a problem with substances and alcohol.

Most of the public who notice your news would like to see you become healthy. And I, for one, will try not to flog you further than you already manage to flog yourself. Two whips isn't better than one.

Lindsay's Playboy News: Oh No!