How About Sex With Your Fries?

This time the Fries are courtesy of McDonald's, the only fries sans fish available to be sold "alone" inside the Olympic Village during the upcoming Games in 11 days. Nearby, in the Athletes Village, one may want a condom or twelve, if years' worth of whispers and outright admissions from athletes are to be trusted that it's all sex and more sex between the well-buffed human specimens of majestic physical feats, particularly after their events are over and they must wait out the remaining time before wandering around the stadium during the closing ceremonies clutching flowers, beaming, pouting, shouting, exhausted, exhilarated - and/or all of the above.

The sex I understand. Young, fit, oft-single Type A's are teeming with more than Team Spirit during such heady times in one's life. Numerous moments spent in Carnal Desire is one healthy way to relieve the stress of intense competition, as well as provide a trophy of another sort following 4 strenuous years of training. I say Have Fun, be Safe and try not to break any hearts along the way.

However, after sexing it up many people are hungry. A carton/bag of fries/chips is just the thing to top off the calorie loss from sex, but if that's all you want and you don't want it from McDonald's, then you are out of luck even if you had been luckier earlier in the day/evening in Bedroom Sports. No other food outlet in the Village can sell a solo bag of fries/chips unless accompanied by fish. An odd sort of chaperone.

That's right. Only McDonald's Fries are allowed to go out alone in the vast morass of athletic humanity. They have Special Rights the other french fries don't. They almost own the place! Stand by and let them pass...

McDonalds' monopoly with the solo cardboard containers of French Fries I can understand only as a capitalistic enterprise with Olympic-Size Deep Pockets filled with freshly minted silver and gold coins to toss to the International Olympic Committee and cut off competition in the Village on who can sell the spuds without a side dish. But the Olympic Staff has won a victory of sorts for their palates as they can break McDonald's rigid rules. See This

How sickeningly ironic to have a Fast Food chain with various food items of questionable content sponsoring a hefty portion of the food to be sold at the most important and prestigious International Sports Event focusing on the greatest feats of a healthy human body! 

The following quote makes me laugh...

"Catering for the Olympic Games and Paralympic Games is a monumental task. We want athletes and spectators to have the widest choices of food available and we want that food, wherever possible, to be British." 
- London 2012 Chief Executive Paul Deighton

Of course, it's my understanding that food can be brought INTO the village for private consumption, and other food venues are sharing the space to add a touch of culinary diversification, such as international fare to be found in the Main Hall. And, despite temptation for a Big Mac, I'm sure most of the athletes will remain on their training-gaming diets - at least until their event is finished. (Unless Junk Food is part of their heavy carb intake diet...which a few sports require - but you know that already...)

Nevertheless, think about the reporters and others who must fall back on McDonalds' pathetic excuse for a Fish Sandwich (slathered with a slice of mystery cheese and lots of tartar sauce) if they don't have time to reach the other venues before air time. Add the other two monopolies going on - Coke and Heineken - and chances are reporters will be slurring their words more often than wiping tartar sauce and coke fizz from their faces.

Between the Ralph Lauren Opening Ceremonies Yachting Outfits For The USA Team and the fast-food element, it seems like America is cutting a very mixed message swath through this year's Olympic Games. And, with the food sponsorship in the Olympic Village, it didn't have to go the way of corporate sponsorship because the host country, England, could have paid for a variety of amenities as their Olympic monies are from the gov't, not the private sector as is the case in the U.S.

Then again, perhaps McDonald's decided to cash-in on the Post-Sex Hunger Of Youth, knowing the reputation of Athlete's Village. As any American teen knows, those burgers and fries taste awfully good after a romp or three.

Wheeeee!!!


[Edited/corrected 11 x after publication due to spelling and punctuation errors caught by author who almost fainted at each discovery. Hah!]


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